This is a rather blue post, so please don't read if you're in a bad mood. It will just bring you down.
There are days when I feel like I just get my heart stomped on, and today was one of them. Now, most people are usually relieved when they are released from church responsibilities, but, generally, I am not one of them. Today, I (and the rest of our presidency) was released, due to a move from the president. You would think that I would be happy about it, because serving in church presidency takes a lot of time and effort. And yes, it did, but, seeing as I have lots of time on my hands, it was a welcome respite from my hours alone at home. I loved the ladies that I served with. They have become some of my very best friends. I shared some of my darkest moments with them, and they always had my back. I loved that we all just did to get it all done, regardless of responsibility, well "official" responsibility. I loved the kids that were under my stewardship-all 180 of 'em. Yes, primary was huge. And to just be released from all that responsibility is rather harsh. (It also doesn't help when 3 of the the newly called presidency refused teaching callings in said organization-and yet they will be happy to serve in a presidency.) So not only do I feel loss, I feel anger. Grrrrr! Men don't understand. So my normally fabulous listening hubby is not comprehending my feelings at this moment. Maybe tomorrow it will be better understood. Maybe I will understand better myself, as right now I am just hurt and bugged about the whole thing. And so I am off to bed to nurse my broken heart, and to pray for understanding.
I understand. I just think that change is hard for us women. Especially when the release came early because of a move. It is frustrating that people glorify some calling and only want those ones! I was always discusted too in people that wouldn't work in primary. On the bright side they are now going to have to deal with that fact and maybe their hearts will be pricked and a change will occur with them. I know you will feel better as the situation moves futher away. Chin up my friend. I am sure next you will be called right back in as a teacher or something that is what happened to me and I loved it! (although it was hard to see them make changes I didn't like or understand)
ReplyDeleteMiss ya!